new sodom

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

New Sodom, USA

Sunday night the budget for the District of Columbia was passed by the Senate without the country’s legislative body batting an eye. Normally this wouldn’t be worth mentioning (other than pointing out how strange it is that the federal government has to sign off on a city’s non-federal budget), but among the programs scheduled to be funded by the D.C. city government next year are a needle exchange program (added to the budget by Republicans), abortions for poor women, and the legalization of medical marijuana. Again, the budget breezed through Congress without a hitch. The benefits of seeking passage on a Sunday night in the middle of December, I suppose.

The D.C. city council is hoping to pull a similar trick with more legislation slated to transform the capital city of (easily) the most conservative first world nation into a shining New Sodom: same-sex marriage. The council had previously passed the resolution with an 11-2 vote, and after a strange let’s-sit-on-our-vote period, they voted earlier today to pass it again, with the same 11-2 vote. However, previously unbeknownst to me, the bill the council passed must undergo 30 working days of Congressional review after Mayor Adrian Fenty signs it in to law as he has promised. Is this review period worth worrying about?

Well, it is technically possible that this could explode into a national issue and be voted down by the House and Senate under intense pressure from people blinded by hate, money, and misguided religious beliefs but this is extraordinarily unlikely. It’s late December, these people want to go on their Hanukwansmas breaks. Then it will be January, and they will want to go back on their breaks. Democrats are busy organizing a lynch mob to torch Joe Lieberman’s house and hang his entire family from the White House Christmas tree. Democratic leaders have already implied they don’t really want to get involved in another same-sex marriage debate. 30 working days is an awfully short period of time to turn nothing into something, to convince already preoccupied senators that they will lose their jobs if they affirm a gay marriage bill for a city of 600,000 people that they don’t seem to care much about anyway. Congress has only overturned a DC law three times in the past 25 years.

While we have plenty of reasons to assume that Congress won’t touch this law, we can’t get ahead of ourselves and write of the seemingly impossible as actually being impossible. A lot of people, myself included, didn’t think Proposition 8 had a chance in hell of passing. Be cautiously optimistic, not certain. When I checked my iTouch for any news updates from the AP, I did get a good sign that DC’s same-sex marriage law will stay under the radar. Rather than it saying “Breaking: D.C. city council votes 11-2 to legalize same-sex marriage,” it read, “Breaking: A spokesman for Oral Roberts says the evangelist and university founder has died at age 91.” Oh, the irony.

28
Manifestos:


unokhan
said…

u killed oral you bastard


BBC
said…

Let's see, you're 19 if I recall. I'm sure that by the time you are 40 you'll have all this shit fixed, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

And then Leslie will give you a blow job, ha ha ha ha ha


BBC
said…

By then she won't have any teeth but be thankful for that. 🙂


sgraffito
said…

I will still have teeth in 21 years.

But you will be totally fucking dead.


eccentric recluse
said…

such discourse….

Don't hold your breath here. A lot depends on how health care goes. don't underestimate the power of the congress to screw up anything, particularly if the party out of power if feeling all giddy over a victory or all downtrodden over a defeat….

nice to see you all again.


Gadfly
said…

Meh… by the time you're 40, the Yellowstone lava dome will have exploded and our entire ant farm will have been shaken too its foundations and we will be a minor species again …

Ye gods! I sound like BBC!


kara
said…

is it sad that i'm so cynical and disillusioned that the most shocking part of your post is that you're a college student who can afford an itouch?


unokhan
said…

roll up yer sleeves

http://www.sltrib.com/news/ci_14003914


Southside Rabbitslayer
said…

You're lucky to any form of local government.

DC – 61 sq mi
RI – 1,214 sq mi

Washington is not just any town. So you have to answer to the Feds, big deal. The rest of us have to answer to a county, then a state and then the feds.

The "marriage fight" is one of human rights anyway, which should be fought on the Federal level.


Southside Rabbitslayer
said…

to [have] any

see, you so small you have no representation.


Woozie
said…

Uno: Never much liked being on the receiving end of Oral.

ER: Nice to see you too <3

Gadfly: You do. Get help, please.

Kara: Well since I bought it from the school (at a discount!) I was able to charge it to my student account, which basically means they gave me the iTouch and tacked on another couple hundred dollars to my tuition to cover it. Pretty nice deal, if you ask me.

Uno: Load your guns?

Eastside: The stink in DC about that is that they don;t have any voting representation in either hall of Congress, but are still subject to federal taxes. And while it's true DC isn't your normal city it makes sense, at least to me, that they'd be upset over not even having one person they voted into office being able to represent their wishes when it comes to reviewing DC law.

Of course I'm speaking as if the government worked as designed and taught to the chilluns.

Also lol


Southside Rabbitslayer
said…

The city could be incorporated into Maryland. Then the urbanites could have even more taxes and the pitiful representation the rest of us have. I also don't think it would aid in the fight for Washingtonians fight for equal rights.


Southside Rabbitslayer
said…

wow, i'm really rusty on the writtin.


BBC
said…

I will still have teeth in 21 years. But you will be totally fucking dead.

I sure as hell hope so, it would free me of you.

So how long do these guys have to wait to get a toothless blow job from you without raking your teeth over the coals, so to speak.

I'm also interested in how much it's cost you to keep teeth you don't really need in this day and age.

But I'm sure your dentist loves you, ha ha ha ha ha


dmarks
said…

"Eastside: The stink in DC about that is that they don;t have any voting representation in either hall of Congress,"

So then you avoid what I have here: having two Senators that always act against my interests.


unokhan
said…

dm is right, and this contradiction happens over and over because people –like the stupid germans for instance– can be misled into confusing the interests of the nation with the interests of corporations (krupps for instance).

sons, don't get your legs blown off for general mcchrystal or his boss, general electric


BBC
said…

Sunday night the budget for the District of Columbia was passed by the Senate without the country's legislative body batting an eye.

That must be a pretty confusing mess if you ask me. Being as even though it's thought of as a state by many it's really not.

More like a separate country, if you ask me they fucked that up when forming this country.


Gadfly
said…

Don't the DC license plates read something like "taxation without representation". They might be the only collective to actually be placated a bit by congress *chuckle*


secret agent woman
said…

Sometimes I intend to comment on the actual post and then the surreal comments throw me completely.


Omar
said…

Never much liked being on the receiving end of Oral.

Who the fuck doesn't like getting head?

Weirdo.


thimscool
said…

SuperFreak!


december's children
said…

maybe the amount of head cheese he has hiding down there prevents him from getting any?


unokhan
said…

this is soo not funny


Omar
said…


this is a better bet


sgraffito
said…

I'm also interested in how much it's cost you to keep teeth you don't really need in this day and age.

But I'm sure your dentist loves you, ha ha ha ha ha


Teeth I don't need? Here's the thing, Billy…I need to be what we call "front of house". A mouth full of rotted gums and stank breath might work in your neck of the woods, but not mine.

Also, you might want to research the connection between oral hygiene and cardiovascular disease next time you're not devoting every post to my existence. Sorry, "alleged" existence.

Have a lovely holiday in your castle of shit.


Omar
said…

I'm confident your teeth are lovely, but I hear your new nose make you look Jewish. I mean, that's great when you're in New York, but "front of house" in LA? With a schnoz the size of Brooklyn? Aye, aye, aye.


Josh
said…

On the subject of New Sodom, I saw an actual response from Uganda regarding criticism of their planned legislation to kill the gays, and they referred to the west as having ushered in a "new Sodom and Gaymorrah". Yes folks, Gaymorrah.


Josh
said…

From an elected official, no less!